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Saudi Arabia

THE UMBRELLA AND THE MALLET

We five have arranged ourselves in the usual

position: facing the sea; chairs in a row;

striped windbreak stretched out behind us;

multi-coloured umbrella above the

humble paterfamilias. This

is our favourite beach, Traeth Benllech:

with views of the remains of a hillfort

on a distant promontory; of the Great Orme –

shaped like the dragon’s head the Norse sailors saw –

a far peninsula on the mainland;

of container ships on the horizon

waiting for low tide to dock in Liverpool;

of the sea itself here at low water –

soft sibilants a fair walk away.

 

On the sands fifteen yards in front of us

and slightly to our left three Muslim women,

in hijabs and embroidered abayas,

with two small children, set up their camp.

Their picnic table is substantial,

and adorned with an elegant coffee pot.

Their umbrella is multi-coloured

like ours. They push its spike manually

into the sand. I fear the worst. They sit,

and call the children to the picnic.

The prevailing gentle south westerly

upends the brolly. They rise, and again

push the spike down as far as they can.

The wind fills the umbrella like a sail.

 

“Those three ladies need assistance,” I say.

One of our party, a stalwart in a storm,

rises, and approaches the group, our mallet

held unthreateningly at his side.

We watch the dumb-show of smiles and gestures.

He hammers the bottom firmly in,

and places the top half at an angle.

We watch the gestures and the smiles. He returns.

We applaud. Almost immediately

one of the women approaches smiling

and carrying a small metal tray.

“They are lukmat,” she explains, extending

the tray of small pastries. “Morsels in English.

They have been fried and then covered in

fig sauce. Please take as many as you want”.

And we do. “It is a Middle East custom.

I am from Yemen. My friends” – she gestures

with her head – “are from Saudi Arabia

and Syria”. I manage, “Shukraan”,

and she asks if I speak Arabic, and I laugh

deprecatingly. One her friends arrives

with the coffee pot and five small paper cups.

“I am from Saudi Arabia,” she says,

smilingly. “This is Arabic coffee.

There is no sugar” – and she gives each of us

a cup and pours. We thank her, and sip.

The coffee’s bitterness has been tempered

by cardamom, that sweetens the breath.

 

They leave before us. There are waves and smiles.

Later, as we drive up the steep hill home,

I recall that I know another word of

Arabic – yamal, hope.

 

 

 

 

THE FOURTH ANGLO-AFGHAN WAR

‘You have been in Afghanistan, I perceive’,

observed Holmes to the astounded Watson,

having noted that the doctor’s face spoke

‘of hardship and sickness’. He had seen action

in the Second Anglo-Afghan War, which,

like the First was all about The Great Game

and Russia, and both, like the Third, all

about the British Raj, that Jewel in the Crown,

and Afghan monarchs that might be cajoled

with sufficient treasure or sufficient blood,

while the true rulers, the tribal elders

of the ethnic groups, parleyed with all sides.

 

The Great Game continues, and with new players:

America, China, Iran, Pakistan,

Saudi Arabia. Are Taliban –

who, as some predicted never went away,

but fought a twenty year insurgency –

aka Mujahideen aka

‘freedom fighters’ (to quote Margaret Thatcher),

and the well-funded, so-called Islamic State –

that movable terror, that mobile nihilism –

pawns in the new game,

useful idiots in the exploitation

of the country’s many mineral fields?

 

Those who brought Enduring Freedom chose

not to eradicate polio

but supplied electricity throughout

enabling scenes of havoc and mayhem

to be broadcast on WhatsApp and Instagram.

So, record the lies about Afghanistan –

hypocritical, self-serving untruths,

which ignore the torture at Bagram Air Base,

which prioritise the lives of dogs. Record

that the liars are mostly privileged,

sanctimonious, nostalgic, white

imperialists, some moonlighting as hacks.

 

The Fourth war has masqueraded under

two different euphemisms,

Operation Herrick and then Toral,

and been fought with allies – with Nato,

and the erstwhile Afghan Army and Police –

and achieved no discernible victories,

no battle honours only body bags,

only more of the maimed and the desperate,

only incompetence and abandonment –

against lightly-armed zealots on Chinese-made

Honda motor bikes with a seemingly

endless supply of imported fuel

financed by hectares of exported drugs,

and for whom aspects of criminality,

particularly towards women and girls,

appear a brutal and sacred duty,

in a poor country corrupted with money,

a Ponzi scheme for foreign consultants.

 

Although its capital city, Kabul,

remains the only one in the world

without a railway station, the trade

in opium and hashish has blossomed,

Afghanistan becoming the world leader –

which might have rendered even Holmes speechless.