David Selzer is a writer of poetry, prose fiction, screenplays and stage plays. He embraces digital platforms to share his work of more than fifty years… READ MORE


  • MARJORIE BEEBE’S BOTTOM

    For Ian Craine

     

    ‘Marjorie Beebe is the greatest comic possibility that ever worked in my studio. I think she is destined to become the finest comedienne the screen has ever seen.’  Mack Sennett

     

    Marjorie Beebe in 'The Farmer's Daughter' 1928

     

    Her bottom was a serious matter:

    the butt, as it were, of numerous pratfalls

    in many Mack Sennett two reelers – like

    The Chumps, Campus Crushes and The Cowcatcher’s

    Daughter – in which she was a capricious,

    lubricious Columbine with witty eyes

    and good teeth and various Harlequins,

    who ended invariably as losers.

    From Kansas City, her mother took her,

    on the Yellow Brick Road, to Tinsel Town.

    Beebe and Sennett became lovers, despite

    or because of the thirty year difference,

    so he knew her asset first hand so to speak.

    From silents to talkies, slapsticks to wise cracks,

    her Mid West accent playing well, then Mack goes bust

    and Marjorie gradually disappears.

    Was it the booze? She was certainly

    a toper. Or, more likely, The Hays Code:

    irony suppressed, vulgarity outlawed,

    Puritan America triumphant!



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